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Thursday, March 21, 2024

"Does This Mean Our Relationship Is Over?"

Glovey Wovey...

Well, I really have no one to blame but myself. Three Wednesdays ago, I received a third “invite” to visit my urologist. At first, it was with the phone call. Then, a text message. Both of each, I ignored. Finally, through My Chart, the front desk requested an interview of some sort.


At last, I walk through the door of the doctor’s office and is handed a list of pages I am suppose to fill out.


“Ma’am, why do I need to fill these forms out?” You guys have been harassing me for over a month and therefore, I assume you have all the information you need on me!”


“I’m sorry,” is all she said.


“Yeh, me too!”


Signed, sealed and delivered, I was seated in one of the rooms after another inquisition and a good pee in a cup, I await the urologist, and peruse the many interesting models and all the wonderful things that could go wrong with one’s “pleasure machine!”


The urologist enters a few minutes later to tell me that my urine is fine and that all systems seem fine, but…


“Mister Bensen, I am curious as to why do you have two urologists?”


“I do?”


Laughing, I proceed to tell him the shortened version of my “Tales Of Testosterone” epic. I could tell from the look on his face he was only slightly amused.


“So, you are seeing this doctor and he is monitoring you levels every six months… Correct?”


“Yes, I guess so. It’s about time to see him soon,” I said, a bit apologetically. I thought that guy was you guys!”


“So you won’t be having a need for our services, I assume,” he said.


“I am told because of my age that I won’t be needing a PSA exam for another five years, so I guess not”… 


“Not with you guys, at least!”


“Well, okay, but before I let you go, let’s make sure all is well and have another look anyway!”


I thought,”you mean for old time’s sake” but I didn’t say it.


As expected, I passed the test with a quick poke from the blue fickle finger of fate. Pulling my pants back up, I turned to the man, looked him straight in the eye, and as he ripped away his gloves asked him  with a slight smirk on my face…


 “Is this the end… Does this mean our relationship is over?”  Will I ever see you again?


“No,” he said.


First loving Giddy Up cup!


Copyright 2024/Ben Bensen III













Sunday, March 3, 2024

"A Different Kind Of Tip Jar!"

 

Collection Plate?

Good Sunday Morning, all bodies.
The bluegrass band was great the other night. I found it rather interesting that the banjo player used his case as a tip jar. It was placed right at the edge of dance floor in front of the New Heights tent.
I went to the car and retrieved one of my sketchbooks to record the "banjo bank." It was a rather cold, damp night, so I didn't spend much time obsessing over any details. Satisfied with my 20 minute sketch, I closed the book, dropped a five dollar bill in the case and headed home.
First cup!

Copyright 2024/Ben Bensen III

Monday, February 5, 2024

"Total Ellipse from the heart... ha!"


 Here’s today’s product from the Lacombe Art Guild sketching get together, today at the Giddy Up coffee house in Folsom!

Copyright 2024/Ben Bensen III

Friday, February 2, 2024

"Symbiosis"...

Yum...

 Well, good "Groundhog's Day" Friday Morning, all bodies.

What will the big rat have to say about the weather?
Yesterday, I had to have a CT-Scan just to make certain all my innards are behaving themselves. Naturally, in order to see what the scanner needs to see, one has to gulp down two bottles of "barium" with inactive ingredients like sodium benzoate, sodium citrate, potassium sorbate, simethicone emulsion, and benzoic acid all wrapped up in a tasty berry flavored smoothie!
I've had worse smoothies than this, that's for sure.
The deal is that you have to drink a quarter of the bottle of goop every 15 minutes, which leaves a lotta time to be bored. There wasn't many patients hanging around and wrestling with the goop.
One man spent about 15 minutes talking about the dangerous things he did on motorcycles as a 26 year old. In the blink of the eye, he motored in and motored out of the office. Can't say I blame him.
There was one woman who acknowledge me by nodding and saying hello... And, that's all she cared to say, so I decided to sketch her. Problem was, I forgot my sketchbook and some decent pens to draw with.


Desperate to entertain myself between quarterly goop gulps, I borrowed a black Pentel from the nurse at the front desk window and grabbed the blank back pages of a recent patient portal summary and went to town.
"Marlayna", the woman I sketched split after about ten minutes or so, so I turned my attention to a heartfelt, but tacky plastic centerpiece with a metallic fuzzy Valentine centerpiece.
Well, that still gave me another barium bottle to drink and another sixty minutes to blow. I figured in order to be "at one" with nasty stuff, I'd try to see it in another light. Our symbiosis really didn't change anything or make our relationship any more palatable, but the diversion became that spoonful of sugar that helped the medicine goop go down.
The results of my scan will debut sometime next week.
Copyright 2024/Ben Bensen III

Tuesday, January 30, 2024

"Super Duper DeFlation!"

De-Flated...

Good "Super Duper" Day after, Monday morning, y'all.
I'm feeling rather deflated about the entire game... Though I love football, the game, especially the NFL, is impossible to watch nowadays.
Congrats to all the teams that made it to the playoffs, and, I guess, congrats to the teams playing in the Super Bowl, but I have no real interest in the outcome this year. Correct me if I'm wrong, but weren't these two teams in the Bowl game four years ago?
C'est la vie...
What’s the problem w NFL games nowadays?
I never watch it (well that’s a lie, I do watch the Super Bowl each year maybe the last few innings of it anyway


Author
Ben Bensen III
It's a bit difficult to explain to those that really don't follow it on a game to game way. There are way too many changes by the networks to accommodate the female audience.
It's like a boy's club house that displays a sign which says,"No Girls Allowed." Sure enough some female is gonna want to know what's going on and why can't I join.
It doesn't take long before they start making changes and accepting the "softer side".
Understand, I am not against football loving women's participation. It's the NFL and the major networks need for a bigger audience that has caused the slow decline ... As far back as the late 1980's!
Author
Ben Bensen III
But, that answer is only part of the problem. There is now sports betting which I am vehemently against. One example is the pass interference rule which is too nebulous and ripe with fraud. Games can be won and lost on a simple play juried by lawyers in New York and the constant excuses, injury timeouts and such provides for way too many commercial breaks.
There is no flow in the game of football nowadays!




Dorothy S Willse I have to totally agree!


Copyright 2024/Ben Bensen II

Tuesday, January 23, 2024

"Candelabra Cactus!"

Cactus!

So funny… Yesterday, the ice that formed on both cars had me totally locked out. Everything was incased in ice, frozen shut! Using some warm water helped me, just enough, to get into the driver’s side door, but it took a lot of patience and the sun to melt a portion of the windshield to be able to drive.The temperature gauge in the car registered at first 21º.

Today’s a bit different.
Three days ago, I started up sketch season for 2024 at Giddy Up by drawing a new plant that replaced the white poinsettias. It is a cactus called the Candelabra which does have thorns but tastefully placed at each little "leaf." Kinda looks like something piano player, “Liberace” would have had atop his instrument if he, and his brother, George, was into that sort of green thumb thing.
First cup!

Copyright 2024/ Ben Bensen III

Monday, January 15, 2024

"Reading Is Fundamental"

The family that reads together...

 Good "MLK" Monday Morning, all bodies.

Mended a fence board yesterday and felt like I needed every damn tool necessary to complete a simple task. If this keeps up, I'mma need a fancy Roy Rogers design tool belt...
Nothing less will do.
Also, found some time to play around with a few "Reading Is Fundamental" concepts. No tool belt necessary 'cept my electric eraser!
First cup...

Copyright 2023/ Ben Bensen III